Cyber Bullying Part II

[ClaireBear]

Let us all, calmly and like rational adults, talk about cyber bullying.

[Ray]

Yeah, I thought the topic (at least at first) was really interesting, something that could've been talked about if not for some... arguments.

I think it's sad that cyber-bullying has hurt so many people. Yes, it's the internet, and you should never take it as serious business (at least when it comes to social crap). But, it's so sad (and, imo, slightly disturbing) that somebody would say such things to somebody who (usually) hasn't done anything. Like said before in the locked-topic-of-cyber-bullying-part-I, I fell victim to it. I didn't let it take over me, but it still hurt me pretty much. And it really sucks if that person actually knows you (maybe not personally, but maybe they know you a little from school), and decides to be all tough and shit and call you names.

[Ray]

On the topic of cyber-bullying (too many arguments, I'm scared): My friend once got all this shit comments about her breaking up with this one guy (don't know why people would shit over her like that, they were amicably breaking up), and she got all depressed over it. She's over it now, but I was surprised at all the comments (via MySpace, and that's why I care not for MySpace), like "OH YOU STOOPID BITCH Y DID YA BRAKE HIS HART!?!?" or "fat whore", or "FUCKING BIIITCH WHY DID YOU BREAK UP WITH HIM!!!". Then, after getting over her internet-bullied-depression (about a day later) she told 'em off, both on the internet and in their face. "SAY IT TO MY FACE, BITCH! IMMA FUCK YOU UP!" And even her ex laughed at that (at least they're friends). Well, at least something good happened out of cyber-bullying: getting over the fact internet isn't always serious business.

[Darkmoon]

Allow me to make this eminently clear, kids. If you think we're going to sit back and allow personal vendettas then you are both sadly and sorely mistaken. I'm not your parental unit and I very rarely care if someone's insulting you off the forum, because for the most part I neither know nor like people. YamiYumes had every right to post that little attempt, Medic to explain why she did it, and then that should have gone private. Or not. So long as it didn't result in a pair of threads arguing about your dirty laundry where the world can see it.

Now, I'm not closing this thread. I think topics like this, without all the crapfest, can be pretty cool and help develop a certain understanding. I will be deleting all the off topic comments in a few moments. But if I see any of the teen drama here then the person who posts it will regret it. Equally, I do not expect any insults via PM or the private walls.

I hope we have an understanding here, kiddies. Because I will throw infraction points at the next problem post.

Now, on topic. People have bullied me, in real life and on the net. Not the same people and, in the end, neither successfully. Too big and too nasty myself. I know a lot of folk go, 'it's just the net, no reason to get upset' but there are times when the net and real life collide and it's people from your real life giving you grief online. That can be especially hard to deal with, I'm told.

A lot of people who do the bullying think it's all good fun and games. I've talked to several of them, because my folks ran an organization called Parents against Bullying when I was a kid due to the shit I dealt with when I was young. For some, it's just a nasty phase or pressure from another muppet. A lot of them feel terrible about these things in later life, when they think back about deliberately trying to hurt someone, emotionally or physically. Sometimes, it ruins there life. An assault charge. Or the victim of there fun and games goes and hangs themselves. I knew a bunch of girls who put another in a coma, in my school, because they constantly yelled at her for how fat she was. She stopped eating. The next time we saw her she was a human skeleton in a wheel chair. You have never seen a bunch of people more horrified about what they had nearly done.

Cyber bullying is the same thing. Sometimes better, because it doesn't include the physical abuse. Sometimes worse because hiding behind a screen name lets people be truly vile. A lot of people here know I get a lot of shit e-mailed to me because I ban people or give them infractions. Nothing, to date, illegal. But the more pleasant images drudged from /b/, such as the joyous Baby Fuck manga images (recently with my daughters heads photo shopped in, which I felt was an especially nice touch) or the kitten image. All good, wholesome fun right?

Yes, a lot of people on the net have a thick skin. Does that really make it acceptable to basically have a go at someone for little to no reason? Because most of the people you know think it's funny then there isn't a problem? Again, people need to think of there actions. People have killed themselves over this sorta thing. Yes, they were likely not the most stable individuals in the world. That makes it alright? Great, you managed to make a person with a mental illness kill them self. You're no a big man/woman. Congratulations. Now live with it.

[Stars1356]

I love how people are so tough behind a computer. I'm not really on the computer that much so I can't say I have been cyber bullied and as far as in person, well I think most people know not to mess with me. I pretty easy going but don't make me angry:

[Borman]

The key is you are sitting at a computer. Want it to stop? Get up, and walk away, and the problem is solved. Not all that different from real life really.

[Enrico Marini]

Its not fun to be bullied and unfortunately the cyber-bullies are too safe, far, far away from who they are picking on. No real ability to retaliate. I highly believe Annonimity breeds Stupidity. The only piece of advice I can give to those being bullied is to just ignore it.


"Just walk away"

If you ignore the bullies emails/comments, then they will just be wasting their time. Just remember, all it is are words and images. If you pay no attention to them they mean nothing. I know that can be hard to do.

[Carnivol]

Some people are too aware of their right to taking offense from stuff too. I love that. The idea of just for the heck of it getting bothered by something because you can. Not because it actually should bother you or because it's actually something to be bothered by. Oh, no! No matter how pointless, harmless, or meaningless it is - gotta take offense from it, sound the alarms and cry wolf.

The concept of cyber-bullying is most of the time some sort of self-induced problem where the person being cyber-bullied almost actively seeks out the source of the problem, rather than avoiding it.

Sure, there are uncomfortable cases and situations where people are downright nasty to one another - but to take facebook as a sample -> Why on earth does a person have 500+ names on their friendlist? How many of those people do they actually know? How many do they talk to? How many do they consider friends? How many are friends/family? How many were added just because they sent a friend request?

[Shadow Stalker]

This topic is usually the main reason I don't accept friends on Facebook unless there my family relatives that I know of...

...or THIA, due to fact that I've never met any of you personally. (NO offence intended to the people here on THIA)

EDIT: I only do this to avoid cyber-bullying by the way.

[Enetirnel]

I've whacked this into a spoiler-tag, due to the ramble.
Spoiler:

show spoiler

The key is you are sitting at a computer. Want it to stop? Get up, and walk away, and the problem is solved. Not all that different from real life really.

The bit about it not being all that different in real life is something I must somewhat disagree with.

Personally, I've had quite bad bullying issues in real life and online (also involving people from real life involved in those issues, and it's still taking quite some time to get over it all). To the point that police had to be brought in due to the constant invasion of my privacy, and harassment.

In all honesty, I have to agree with Enrico's comment about anonymity however when in such a situation it's a tad hard to avoid the cyber bullying if it's timed on physical and mental attacks by one or multiple people for absolutely no reason or actual provocation aside from making that person(s) feel much better about themselves by constantly mentally or physically attacking people.

In short, it's not always possible to actually ignore cyber bullying when it escalates into constant invasion of privacy, harassment, humiliation and more before it moves offline and into your daily life.

On the overall, (pardon the language) most cyber bullies are absolute bloody tools that continue this childish, idiotic behavior due to their anonymity (in most cases) in order to raise their self-esteem for whatever their reason although most of them I would simply consider as dumbass trolls who have nothing better to do than harass others, have a laugh with their additionally dumbass friends' over "Lulz, look I totally made this [insert age & gender] cry! Interwebz is not for teh kiddies, GTFO!" (just an example of one I saw earlier today) - these should simply be ignored, not even to start annoying them to create another scene (and more than likely, further harassment to other people to attempt to raise their self-esteem, or to simply continue their egotistical lives by placing them higher than others).

Additionally, as Carn has said - a fair amount of people that get targeted by cyber bullies or trolls tend to bring it upon themselves (aside from random victims for amusement) as it can be combined with the anonymity issue bringing about idiots, liars that are caught out and are targeted for such things. If you don't want to become such a target, ignore it and move along. Having the reaction as the example I gave above is certainly not going to help anyone and will most likely encourage the person behind it to continue such behavior. It's not simply an even that occurs on a social networking site such as Facebook, you can find this sort of behavior pretty much everywhere and anywhere online so simply avoiding places such as Facebook doesn't guarantee a free-pass to avoid trolls and cyber bullies.

As for the ones that can escalate, that I personally have been known to refer to as "Ganados" or plain and simple psychos it's best to seek advice (not publicly name-drop on the same forum though) with whichever site/service staff with either a private message or a customer service/report form and if it continues and goes offline to your daily life, then certainly seeking help would be the best thing.

I tried to ignore such things for five or more years and it escalated into death threats/attempts on my life somewhat often whenever I tried to ignore it/deal with the situation. Ignoring doesn't always work but I truly feel that stooping to such a level, such scum to do such things are as DM put it - vile.

It certainly takes time to deal with such events, but in all honesty if it's something that most would classify as a troll - roll your eyes, ignore/delete it if you can/block it if you can and move along instead of fueling the fire or stooping to the same level as whoever is starting that crap.

... My apologies for the slight ramble, just letting it out a little bit. ;

[Cuz7ate9:(]

Ah, just let it go. >.<

BTW... You guys did create the ED on that Peter / Lugial characters, didn't ya? It has links to THIS site all over it. No?

Why does respected members of RE communities like DaMa, Lugial, Peter Anderson, Marco, Cobra and various other ex-Resident Evil site founders all get treated like washed up crap? They all seem like great webmasters with sites, like reHorror, Dino Crisis Fan, TotallyRE, Evil Unleashed, Site Wars and Biohaze. Their sites are so great for news and fan stuff.

http://rehorror.gameriot.com/

http://www.freewebs.com/dinocrisisfan/dinocrisis.html

http://www.totallyre.com/

http://www.biohaze.com/

http://www.evilunleashed.com/

http://www.epicvideogamers.com/

http://www.residentevilfan.com/

Their CSS skills and forums all look very professional, just like THIA is!

[nemesiswontdie]

BTW... You guys did create the ED on that Peter / Lugial characters, didn't ya? It has links to THIS site all over it. No?

Uh...so? Just because it has the links from this site on it doesnt mean that someone on here made it.

[virusassured]

cyber bullying is what u do if your a poofter! case n point!

[Gradon]

cyber bullying is what u do if your a poofter! case n point!

'Poofter?'
Cyberbullying I find personally pathetic, the only cyber bullying I've had though was idle threats from IRL 'friends' threating to kill me or punch my face in.
All I see it as is people trying to be the 'big cheese' (lawl), someone trying to control someone over fear and 'prove' their 'badass attitude'.

[A Jill Sandwich]

'Poofter?'
Cyberbullying I find personally pathetic, the only cyber bullying I've had though was idle threats from IRL 'friends' threating to kill me or punch my face in.
All I see it as is people trying to be the 'big cheese' (lawl), someone trying to control someone over fear and 'prove' their 'badass attitude'.

It's pointless because there is nothing you can do about it anyway. The best thing anyone can do when they're being bullied is to be the better person and ignore it.