The Tale of 1.5

[MeganGrass]

^Just didn't want to mention it directly, but, yeah, bipolarity is what was more commonly known as manic depression before. Stephen Fry's documentary on it is pretty exceptional, as it doesn't really focus on "everyday people" who has it, but famous people who suffer from it (some surprising names in it, even). It's an interesting condition, but with lots of tragedies associated with it, and it's often the main driving force behind people's rise to fame and their talent(s) (and often also, sadly enough, the cause of their fall too).

But, yeah, I dunno how it is for you, as people experience these things differently, but I found The Silver Linings Playbook and the general dialog/behavior/acting in it to be pretty spot on in terms of how a close friend of mine is. (Yeah! It's not just a romantic movie about two good looking people finding one another; it's actually a pretty down to earth and accurate portrayal of individuals suffering from bipolarity; dilusions, cravings, mood swings, extreme opinions, control issues, etc.)

Eh, I don't think he'll mind that I directly mentioned it. Really, it's nothing to be ashamed of. If anything, it's inconvenient at times, and be extremely difficult to manage.... but interesting, none-the-less. Many people with the disorder have done many great things. Just check the list, and you'll know I'm not bullshitting this one.

...I've yet to watch Silver Linings Playbook, though, you're not the first to suggest it. It comes highly recommended. When it comes to this disorder, my biggest problem is money. I'll get a craving to spend cash, my mood swings to do just that and then I'm stuck with hundreds of dollars of merchandise that I don't really need/want, leaving me with extreme opinions of myself (low). Other than that, it's kinda hard to keep friends, with my wide-variance of opinions (I'm always un-intentionally offending someone...)

As I mentioned, though, it can lead to great things. Those with the disorder have a certain 'drive' to do things that those without the disorder would just get frustrated and give up on. Having the disability also helps, tremendously, if that one is really into art, whether it be music, etc.

[Darkmoon]

Let's be clear about this - if you don't think the Team has any right to it, then you also believe that this guy has no right to it and shouldn't be posting it. After all, it's Capcoms property. But that's not what people are saying, is it? I'm not even remotely surprised by the number of people arguing what is best for them, as they see it - the release of the original 1.5 ISO now. It's a short term view, after all. The Team are going to release it too, with the full version, but that means waiting and relying on the team...something some folks don't like.

Let's look a little more at the Colvin thing. I know the person who released the Magic Door build to Colvin, and talked to them a bit about it, hence why I know what happened. I'm pretty sure they said Colvin promised to release nothing, but I might be wrong.

But here's the fun bit - I do know the team were in talks for other betas at the time, and simply put, the Colvin thing blew it. Not because it had been leaked - it's a modded version, after all - but because it made the Team look bad. Now, I don't know the details. I don't even know which betas were up for grabs. But the talk I heard was the RE0 N64 build and some other, non RE stuff.

This is the same shit, different day.

It is possible that this guy managed to track down his own copy. I know of several out there. Maybe he got one of those. If he did then I apologize. But it's far, far more likely that he got a friendship copy from one of the original folks, or someone they passed it too, and should respect there wishes. He apparently isn't going to, and I find that sad, but I'll be damned if I see him taking the credit for other's hard work. Hence why I asked to be allowed to post this.

Also? Thanks for confirming my need to take a holiday. Some of you guys are cool, and I'm not at all surprised by the group that isn't, but I'm definitely gritting my teeth and wishing I didn't still have my mod abilities to ban people right now. I am so. Damned. Tempted.

[alexdz]

Damn, you could make a short film about this stuff, I mean, there's a NeoGAF documentary in the making for god's sake.

Anyway, this all sounds like a very shitty situation but not surprising, the more people you bring in to a project the more likely someone will screw it up.

[Marvin]

And here goes out my respect to people who spend their green on a thing such marvelous as 1.5. I deeply thank you.

[Guest]

Cool story. At least, now those "YOU BROKE 1.5" will shut up for good.

[Sly]

Stop blaming the RE community as a whole, it's offensive. Some of you should watch their mouth. Saying such things as "this community sucks, i'm out fucktards" is unnecessary. Even though I have nothing to do with all that drama, I feel insulted. So please do not generalize like that. There's actually a lot of people who show their support to this project, and they should not be associated in any way with the other ungrateful pests. Those do not represent the whole community.

[News Bot]

Stop blaming the RE community as a whole, it's offensive. Some of you should watch their mouth. Saying such things as "this community sucks, i'm out fucktards" is unnecessary. Even though I have nothing to do with all that drama, I feel insulted. So please do not generalize like that. There's actually a lot of people who show their support to this project, and they should not be associated in any way with the other ungrateful pests. Those do not represent the whole community.

You shouldn't mistake generalizations for "absolutely everyone." No reason to feel insulted if you know you aren't one of the more unsavory characters. I'm sure no comment is aimed at you or others like you (or me).

[Zombie_X]

Thanks for sharing Darkmoon. I knew the gist is the story with the leaks and such, but it's good to know what had fully transpired. It's sad that we may have been screwed out of other betas. Well that's what happens with the RE community.

Hope you are feeling better!

[J0shuaKane]

Eh, I don't think he'll mind that I directly mentioned it. Really, it's nothing to be ashamed of. If anything, it's inconvenient at times, and be extremely difficult to manage.... but interesting, none-the-less. Many people with the disorder have done many great things. Just check the list, and you'll know I'm not bullshitting this one.

...I've yet to watch Silver Linings Playbook, though, you're not the first to suggest it. It comes highly recommended. When it comes to this disorder, my biggest problem is money. I'll get a craving to spend cash, my mood swings to do just that and then I'm stuck with hundreds of dollars of merchandise that I don't really need/want, leaving me with extreme opinions of myself (low). Other than that, it's kinda hard to keep friends, with my wide-variance of opinions (I'm always un-intentionally offending someone...)

As I mentioned, though, it can lead to great things. Those with the disorder have a certain 'drive' to do things that those without the disorder would just get frustrated and give up on. Having the disability also helps, tremendously, if that one is really into art, whether it be music, etc.

this "disorder" always sounds like the human condition, what we all have to deal with. anyone i have ever known personally or anything i have ever read says pretty much everyone is bi-polar. oh yeah, i was diagnosed with it multiple times.

then again, i am old-school. my dad has physical disabilities and never used it as an excuse for anything. and has raised me to feel the same way. everyone is different, and you are just you.

and your signature is hilarious. i will be laughing about it for a while.

[The_Wes]

Is good to know all the true. Now all have sense.

[MeganGrass]

this "disorder" always sounds like the human condition, what we all have to deal with. anyone i have ever known personally or anything i have ever read says pretty much everyone is bi-polar. oh yeah, i was diagnosed with it multiple times.

then again, i am old-school. my dad has physical disabilities and never used it as an excuse for anything. and has raised me to feel the same way. everyone is different, and you are just you.

and your signature is hilarious. i will be laughing about it for a while.

Eh, not quite. Some just have it worse than others.

For example, it is not normal to buy 2,000$ worth of DVDs in a single 'buy'. Yes, I have done just that. It's an extremely random, obsessive-compulsion that plays side-by-side with bipolar disorder. That said, I usually use my mania for something good (programming, musical instruments, etc).

...and no, I wasn't claiming it should be used for his 'excuse'. There is no excuse, but his condition should be taken into consideration by those who didn't otherwise know, already. As Carnivol mentioned, I don't think he's some evil jackass, hell-bent on destroying the entire community. He just has... issues.

The signature is a quote from a David Bowie song, properly titled, "I'm afraid of Americans". And I am, very much so... but I'm also American. Bipolarity?!

[J0shuaKane]

i used to work in my uncles video store i would see that kind of thing quite often. people spend their money on different things. i mean, unless you were starving or becoming homeless because of it.

or in my own case, i am just really passionate about pretty much everything, so i was extreme this and fancy-word that. people shouldn't be made to feel that way about themselves, everyone has their vices and whatever. or you can talk yourself into trying to fit what other people call normal.

and i do kind of feel for colvin, in the sense that we all make mistakes and in the end he tried to back out and apologize, but the damage was done.

and i know quite few black people that are afraid of and/or don't like black people. i read about a kindergarten brawl on yahoo the other day, of course here in cleveland. even with a pipe and a hammer! there is reason to be afraid of alot of people, so its understandable.

i still find it funny you put it there, only because i consider myself to be very american.

[Carnivol]

this "disorder" always sounds like the human condition, what we all have to deal with. anyone i have ever known personally or anything i have ever read says pretty much everyone is bi-polar. oh yeah, i was diagnosed with it multiple times.

I doubt any doctor (or psychiatrist, rather) worthy of his credentials would quickly diagnose someone with bipolarity, as the tests for it are usually pretty extensive and covers quite a lot of other, more likely, alternatives first. The common thing these days, which is everyone's go to excuse for all sorts of misbehavior, is to suggest some form of ADD/ADHD as the reason for someone's inability to fit in or adapt. People also have a terrible tendency to blindly assume they have various types of personality disorders such as these based on reading some of the identifying traits on a wiki article (or worse; PLZ SHARE pics on Facebook) and nod in agreement and recognition of some of them, without really fully understanding the full extent of it all. Just 'cause you've spent a weekend in your bomb shelter, forgetting to charge your cellphone whilst playing Skyrim doesn't make you an introvert.

Due to the typical hormon changes in puberty and during the teens, bipolairty is rarely diagnosed or detected at this age, as it can be quite hard to differ between bipolarity and just typical puberty-esque hormon changes at young age. Everyone's different and bla bla bla.

"Problem" with bipolarity is that you have highs and lows. Beyond your control. It's rooted all the way down in not just the wiring of your brain, but in the chemical production in your body. And rather than the person just exaggerating when they express something extreme, those things expressed during those highs and lows are straight out true. Even if not permanent. They are true in that very moment. No acting or deliberate/intentional exaggeration. Common treatment for bipolarity is a cocktail of medication tailored you, one that is usually worked out through long periods of trial and error - unless you're in a family with a known history of it, then you can usually assume the same treatment as your biological relatives. The cocktail is basically a way of trying to stabilize you (emotionally), often resulting in an undesirable zombified state. (Man, people like that are creepy. The lack of enthusiasm, care, and emotional respons is terrifying ... in the same way brainwashed child soldiers and such are a terrifying thing. A human being that's quite literally just an organic computer, stripped of all personality and just awaiting instructions.)

Extra bla bla bla, not everyone's the same bla bla bla, here's something about a friend;
Spoiler:

show spoiler

I have a friend who's struggled with it all life, and it's made things tough in terms of socializing, especially amongst people who don't know how this works. It's a strange thing to see an extreme case like that up close, almost dangerous if you don't know how they work, 'cause you have a person that can literally hate you more than anything in the entire world and you'll get to know it. Up front. And it's not through blind insults or friendly jabs. Every single word and action can and most likely will come from a place that's creepishly calculated, meant to hurt and usually fished out from a place behind that part of your brain that normally says you shouldn't say or do that. The same goes also the other way, when the tears are rolling, maybe regrets of previous actions beyond their control or the fear of something happening, they're not crocodile tears or just a blind call for a little affection; the flood gates are open and you gotta be pretty dead inside yourself if you can't tell that they're not just exaggerations, but actually pure emotions all the way down to the last drop. No acting involved.

And then you have the most amazing thing of all; when people like this shine. They truly shine. They can have cravings for something, like an addiction of sort. Wanting to achieve or get something. Basically anything that'll release endorphines and trigger the feeling of accomplishing something . Or they can just be positive emotional outbursts. Ever had someone tell you they love you? You can tell when someone really means it and when someone just says it as a gesture of apprecitation or empty words. If I do something for this friend that is appreciated, which some people would just say "thanks" for, I might sometimes get an "I love you so much!" as a reply and the creepy thing is ... you can feel it all the way through your body that it's true. This person truly loves you for what you just did. Right there, that very moment, that person is emitting the same type of emotional outburst as someone who's basically met the love of their life, their soul mate, or had their life rescued from the most horrible situation ever. It can last for just a moment. But the tricky thing is, as with the other two types of emotional outbursts I just described, to not let yourself get dragged into them or let yourself be hurt by them, or even worse; try to exploit them, 'cause the emotions are very much the real deal - even if it's just for a short moment.

It's understandable that it can be a lot to swallow and hard to imagine, but not everyone's capable of dealing with people that has a condition like that.

Either way, I recommend watching the documentaries and movies suggested. They draw a pretty good picture of how these things often are, both the highs and lows of it all. One as an educational piece on it and the other as feel good entertainment.

[J0shuaKane]

making up a name to match behavior patterns is pointless. at best you are classifying and treating symptoms instead of the problem. and if there is not one, you are making one by giving these things a name.

my dude gump is a video game genius. he beat kaizo mario 1&2 in a week. i would trust him with my life, but i would not trust him to hold a glass of water. he can't focus on anything but video games and cooking. a super-klutz. i don't see anything wrong with that.

the things you mention are things everyone deals with. no matter how one acts.

you don't have honest emotions and severe cravings? sounds boring...

"It's understandable that it can be a lot to swallow and hard to imagine, but not everyone's capable of dealing with people that has a condition like that."
i think this has more to do with ones comfort zone. by that i mean the people that can't deal.

[MeganGrass]

i used to work in my uncles video store i would see that kind of thing quite often. people spend their money on different things. i mean, unless you were starving or becoming homeless because of it.

or in my own case, i am just really passionate about pretty much everything, so i was extreme this and fancy-word that. people shouldn't be made to feel that way about themselves, everyone has their vices and whatever. or you can talk yourself into trying to fit what other people call normal.

and i do kind of feel for colvin, in the sense that we all make mistakes and in the end he tried to back out and apologize, but the damage was done.

and i know quite few black people that are afraid of and/or don't like black people. i read about a kindergarten brawl on yahoo the other day, of course here in cleveland. even with a pipe and a hammer! there is reason to be afraid of alot of people, so its understandable.

i still find it funny you put it there, only because i consider myself to be very american.

Well, you see, that's the problem - I have starved and been homeless because of it. When one is truly bipolar and in "that mood" to spend money, future necessities are of no concern; priorities such as 'rent' and 'groceries' becomes a trivial and blurred, if even thought-of during mania, at all.

And I have the same problem, becoming impassioned with just about anything. So much to the point where I almost become obsessed, literally studying everything there is to know. All the work I've done toward Resident Evil is a shining example.

...we live fairly close to each other, if that gives ya a sense of my Americana.

I doubt any doctor (or psychiatrist, rather) worthy of his credentials would quickly diagnose someone with bipolarity, as the tests for it are usually pretty extensive and covers quite a lot of other, more likely, alternatives first. The common thing these days, which is everyone's go to excuse for all sorts of misbehavior, is to suggest some form of ADD/ADHD as the reason for someone's inability to fit in or adapt. People also have a terrible tendency to blindly assume they have various types of personality disorders such as these based on reading some of the identifying traits on a wiki article (or worse; PLZ SHARE pics on Facebook) and nod in agreement and recognition of some of them, without really fully understanding the full extent of it all. Just 'cause you've spent a weekend in your bomb shelter, forgetting to charge your cellphone whilst playing Skyrim doesn't make you an introvert.

Due to the typical hormon changes in puberty and during the teens, bipolairty is rarely diagnosed or detected at this age, as it can be quite hard to differ between bipolarity and just typical puberty-esque hormon changes at young age. Everyone's different and bla bla bla.

"Problem" with bipolarity is that you have highs and lows. Beyond your control. It's rooted all the way down in not just the wiring of your brain, but in the chemical production in your body. And rather than the person just exaggerating when they express something extreme, those things expressed during those highs and lows are straight out true. Even if not permanent. They are true in that very moment. No acting or deliberate/intentional exaggeration. Common treatment for bipolarity is a cocktail of medication tailored you, one that is usually worked out through long periods of trial and error - unless you're in a family with a known history of it, then you can usually assume the same treatment as your biological relatives. The cocktail is basically a way of trying to stabilize you (emotionally), often resulting in an undesirable zombified state. (Man, people like that are creepy. The lack of enthusiasm, care, and emotional respons is terrifying ... in the same way brainwashed child soldiers and such are a terrifying thing. A human being that's quite literally just an organic computer, stripped of all personality and just awaiting instructions.)

Extra bla bla bla, not everyone's the same bla bla bla, here's something about a friend;
Spoiler:

show spoiler

I have a friend who's struggled with it all life, and it's made things tough in terms of socializing, especially amongst people who don't know how this works. It's a strange thing to see an extreme case like that up close, almost dangerous if you don't know how they work, 'cause you have a person that can literally hate you more than anything in the entire world and you'll get to know it. Up front. And it's not through blind insults or friendly jabs. Every single word and action can and most likely will come from a place that's creepishly calculated, meant to hurt and usually fished out from a place behind that part of your brain that normally says you shouldn't say or do that. The same goes also the other way, when the tears are rolling, maybe regrets of previous actions beyond their control or the fear of something happening, they're not crocodile tears or just a blind call for a little affection; the flood gates are open and you gotta be pretty dead inside yourself if you can't tell that they're not just exaggerations, but actually pure emotions all the way down to the last drop. No acting involved.

And then you have the most amazing thing of all; when people like this shine. They truly shine. They can have cravings for something, like an addiction of sort. Wanting to achieve or get something. Basically anything that'll release endorphines and trigger the feeling of accomplishing something . Or they can just be positive emotional outbursts. Ever had someone tell you they love you? You can tell when someone really means it and when someone just says it as a gesture of apprecitation or empty words. If I do something for this friend that is appreciated, which some people would just say "thanks" for, I might sometimes get an "I love you so much!" as a reply and the creepy thing is ... you can feel it all the way through your body that it's true. This person truly loves you for what you just did. Right there, that very moment, that person is emitting the same type of emotional outburst as someone who's basically met the love of their life, their soul mate, or had their life rescued from the most horrible situation ever. It can last for just a moment. But the tricky thing is, as with the other two types of emotional outbursts I just described, to not let yourself get dragged into them or let yourself be hurt by them, or even worse; try to exploit them, 'cause the emotions are very much the real deal - even if it's just for a short moment.

It's understandable that it can be a lot to swallow and hard to imagine, but not everyone's capable of dealing with people that has a condition like that.

Either way, I recommend watching the documentaries and movies suggested. They draw a pretty good picture of how these things often are, both the highs and lows of it all. One as an educational piece on it and the other as feel good entertainment.

You touched on some pretty good points, and just to clarify, I am not self-diagnosed and don't use my condition as an excuse for anything. But, those who know me knows that it certainly explains a lot.

Concerning the meds; I stopped taking them many years ago for the exact reasons you've stated. They turn people in zombies, quite literally. I'd rather be manic than feel nothing at all. The best combo I had was an anti-depressant paired with a mood stabilizer. During that time, I didn't 'act out', or even get manic. In fact, I didn't do much of anything. Eat. Sleep. Shower. Repeat.


ahahaha, I'm not afraid to show emotion, either. And you're right - it may seem extreme - but it's how I feel, at that point in time. If I tell someone "I love You", I really care for their well-being, happiness, etc. It doesn't matter who hears it, either. Really, you've got a great understanding of the whole stigma and the realities surrounding it. It almost felt like I was the friend you were talking about.